Sunday, December 13, 2009

The Annual Magic Failure

A while a go I made a survey letting you guys vote who is the Magic Failure of the Year 2009.

Number 3: Steven Youell

Yeah our favourite troublemaker of the magic café got third place. For those of you who don't know. Steven Youell is a self proclaimed authority on card magic. I have read one of his ebooks. Ironically he sent it to me after I made him our very first Weekly Magic Failure. And all I can say, it is the most awful piece of magic literature I have read. Most bad stuff at least has some entertainment value. But this had none. The routines where boring and the methods needlessly complicated. Expect one thing... In there was a really nifty way of glimpsing a peeked at card. I really liked that.

But that is not the reason he was awarded the awesome title WMF. No he got it because of his behaviour on the magic café. The owner of the magic café Steve Brooks is a good friend of Steven Youell. And that gives him certain powers. Editing powers. Steven Youell denied that in a few conversations I had with him. But I do not believe him. I heard so many first hand stories of friends of mine, of threads disappearing or being closed with Youell having the last word. And he sends out private messages threatening other users not to mess with the mighty Steven Youell. (I have screenshots to back that up)

Steven Youell was the very reason that this blog exists. We needed a second opinion.
Anyway, I remember that Steven Youell was sick for a while. Steve Brooks even send out a public message asking everybody to purchase Youell's lecture notes, so Youell can use the money to get well. Wow a sales pitch based on the premise of a sick man. Now that is sick. Anyway, he got third place. And well deserved I might add.

Number 2: Shawn Farquahr

Remember him. The winner of this years FISM. Boy was that some good time. He was a magic failure because of his attitude. (which was way before FISM) Basically what he does, is thinking of himself as the "shit". As the best thing that happened to magic ever. My thinking was , that he falls asleep each night thinking "I'm so great, I'm so great, I'm so great"... and there are a few hints that back me up on this one.

He is a name dropper, a habit that I deplored many, many times. For instance, he did a lecture and on that lecture he said that he could not tell who his client was, but it was in the white house. Why would anybody say that except to crave attention. And he needs that attention so badly...

So is he a bad magician. No, he is not. He is decent. Most of the Weekly Magic Failures are not awarded for being bad. Mostly for being liars, cheaters, cowards, schmucks, stinkers and that sort of stuff. (Hell, I awarded myself for being a Meany) So Shawn basically got the title WMF for being cheap. For all sorts of things. Example: In a promotion video, he actually has the balls to have his ego stroked, by having the song "Stand Up (for the Champion)" by Right Said Fred being played in the video. Wow, that is bad.

Anyway, later that year he was awarded the title World Champion by the FISM-crew (which from now on I will call the "bunch of crazy lunatics") Now that was the ego boost this man really didn't need. And he won with an ambitious card, basically. You know that song by Sting called "Shape of my Heart" which is a great song. And cards are named throughout the song. So naturally a perfect song for magicians. So Shaw produced those cards according to the lyrics. And it would have been a beautiful routine... if it wasn't for the fact that Shawns performance during FISM wasn't all that great. Yet the bunch of crazy lunatics failed to see this and awarded him the prize he craved so much.

I was hurt when I learned about this. The FISM that I liked so much turned into a charade. Damn it. Well Shawn got only second place here... as usual.

Number 1: Criss Angel

I never got around the fact that Criss Angel is written "Criss" instead of "Chris". And that the word "Angel" looks exactly the the Germany word "Angel" which means "fishing rod". Funny isn't it? So "Chris Fishing Rod" got the first prize in my stupid little contest. He is the genuine Annual Magic Failure. But why?

In case you live on the other side of the moon, "Chris Fishing Rod" is the host of a show called "Mindfreak" a show about him. He has got that nice emo look going and more gold on his body than Mr. T in his good years. Making him a Weekly Magic Failure was kind of a no brainer. The joke was about him actually being more woman than man and the thing that made him WMF was that he was seemingly unable not to do any camera tricks or rely on stooges. Fact: most of his magic happens in the editing room. Where crucial parts of the performance are cut, giving us a false impression. It was impressive, yes, but it due to the public nature of this Television Show warped the image of magicians.

I do not know why he won the little survey of mine, but I assume it is about all the magicians out there who are pissed about being asked about "Chris Fishing Rod". He made such a heavy impact on the laypeople, who wanted the same kind of experience from any magician, who were unable to deliver that kind of magic.

So for crapping on other magicians "Chris Fishing Rod" got first prize.

Congratulations to all who contributed so much bad magic. I hope you are luckier next year.


Trickster said...

"Example: He actually has the balls to get a standing ovation, by having the song "Stand Up (for the Champion)" by Right Said Fred being played near the end of his show. Wow, that is bad."

I think if you do serious research my little German friend, you'll find that the aforementioned song isn't used at the end of his shows and is only used in a promo video. It seems a shame to attack the guy for some thing he doesn't do.

Roland said...

I fixed that part. Thank you for pointing it out.