Monday, July 16, 2012

The Next Big Thing

If I could turn back time and had my heart ripped out.... I  assume I wouldn't want to be a magician. I would be a magic dealer. Seriously! Think about it! I could buy a product from the big supplier and resell it for about 1000% interest... and call it a discount, when it is 20% off. Of course all of that would make me money, but any business is out to make even more money in less time, so I would have to think of a way to generate money even faster. So I guess my next logical step would be "social networking" I would create some Facebook like trap "to give magicians all over the world the chance to communicate and share their ideas with one another."

Of course people all the magicians would come and do what they have done before, but now they do it at my site. Feeling familiarity and all of that. So whenever I want to sell a product I am right at the costumer base. Not only that. They would feel inclined to buy from me instead of some other dealer. You know... family and stuff.

Hmm, that still wouldn't generate me money fast enough, so I guess the next step is to appeal even more to the common magicians sense to get the latest thing. How about a marketplace where the community has to produce the content. They have to create the magic, make a video and then use your marketplace to sell it. Of course I would get part of the sell.

Not bad. What else? Since I don't care about magic at all (had my heart ripped out, remember) I could resell all the old secrets and "revalue" them. Giving the craving community a "course on the Double Lift." I would probably get a famous magician to do that 4 DVD set. And I do that for every move. Rehashing Tarbell perhaps? Or the whole of the Apocalypse. Yeah... that's it. The Apocalypse DVD set. You could get them monthly to recall the old times. You could probably even get the creators to demonstrate the effects. Yeah... I love it. Of course I would have to wait until Harry dies... but that's what... a couple of years.... who knows, meanwhile I make money with my next big project.

Yeah I will host a grand assembly with all the big names (even Shawn) to let them discuss magic. You know that thing they do for free on the forums, but I would get it on DVD and sell it. Yeah!

What else? Playing cards... those haven't seen a major update in like forever. Novelty playing cards. Including gimmicks. Those will sell like sliced bread. I would even make a fancy trailer with some guy doing flourishes. I will make it look like a movie trailer. (Note to self: Make sure there is at least one iPhone in the shot)

Oh, what about the forums. People share their thoughts there. Maybe I could hop in and hype a product that is about to be released. Offer an early bird discount.... get some big name (they too need money) to say something positive about it, and it will sell like crazy.

Hmm, about those who oppose me? Well I could round up my fans and have them work against me. Saying something like "Illusionistshop 12 has done more for magic than all the secrecy over the years."

I got it now. I would need a web show. I get some morons who love magic and have them review some of the stuff I sell. I put a cat in there too. People love the animal hook.

Yeah... too bad I'm a magician.


KiKeNiCo said...

B*tch Please!

terran said...

apocalypse dvd set

Marplots said...

I don't know if they've done a lot for magic, but they've certainly done a lot to magic. "Bend over magic, you're about to get shagged in the rear end."